Saudi Arabia is no softie when it comes to ‘crime fighting’ so why I ask would it decide now is the time to take the kinder, gentler approach to punishment? I mean, this is a country that still believes in the good ole death penalty via stoning, hanging and/or firing squad. It’s a bizarrely warped place where raped women must fear being punished as adulterers and face stoning death rather than receiving accurate recognition as VICTIMS and treated rightfully to needed medical care while being assured the justice system will punish their attackers. Nah, that’s not how things work in Saudi Arabia. Victims are punished and criminals – at least criminals in the eyes of most logical people – either go free or in the case of admitted al Qaeda supporters, are treated to a stay at the Saudi prison system equivalent of Club Med.

I had to laugh when viewing a 2-part series on BBC [1] about the Saudi justice system’s (as if there is one really) innovative(I’m laughing again) approach to reintegration of those suspected terrorists returning from their stay at Guantanamo Bay courtesy of the US government. Take a moment to watch the video link within the article but be forewarned: the video may cause choking on laughter so refrain from eating or drinking anything during viewing. It’s faking hilarious. It’s hilarious in that classic WHAT THE FAK way not hilarious like a John Candy or Chevy Chase movie. Here are a bunch of guys – ‘former terrorists’ – sitting around the ole day center playing ping pong and kicking back with Sony Playstation games – you know, getting rehabilitated.

Ok some may say it’s very appropriate and surprisingly sensitive of the Saudis to treat their returned citizens to a proper therapeutic environment before reintegration into society and family life. Surely, they deserve some consideration after the horrors they were most likely subjected to while in Guantanamo especially now that most of the world is very well aware of the harsh, inhumane interrogation methods deployed on both ‘real terrorists’(ie guys who proudly admitted their wholehearted allegiance to Osama bin Laden’s boys’ club before any water boarding or sleep deprivation took place) and those the US government just held for the hell of it because they thought it better to round up everyone with an Arab name than take any chances that not all Arabs are not dead set in the ideal of death to America. Better safe than sorry after all since we’re at war and we had to smoke them out of their holes or from their domestic flights within the US when they were just trying to legally and innocently get home to their family reunion or to meet their sister’s new baby because that family reunion could’ve been a sleeper cell meeting or a plot to take down an IHOP when, in fact, it was MERELY a genuine family reunion where you pass the potato salad and listen to your grandmother tells stories you’ve heard 100 times before but politely listen to because it’s your grandmother telling it. Ah W needed no reason for anything because we were at war –oops wait that’s right still at something – and when at war, he could do whatever the fak he pleased under the guise of ‘protecting us from evil’ yet no one seemed too concerned about protecting America, Americans, and the world from him. Funny.

So now Saudi Arabia’s starting to get back some of its admitted extremists – literally. These guys(read the article) admit they were al Qaeda supporters to this day and even outline some of the bombings they participated kind of in a ‘Hey, remember that truck bombing at the Jordanian Embassy in Baghdad circa 2003?? That was 1 of mine’ said ever so proudly as a convicted terrorist who is not debating his guilt or complaining he was subjected to false accusation or conviction. YET Saudi Arabia thinks a round of Pepsi, ping pong, and Playstation in an atmosphere less punishing than the average US juvenile detention center is the proper treatment to make them see the light to purge their minds of these extremist ideologies. Yes I can see the logic. Subject those that have hatred toward the west with purely western recreational methods to ‘punish them’ and so they come to realize not everything western is all that bad.

Ok, ok. They still call it ‘incarceration’ and made sure to show BBC that they’re locked in just like a real jail and everything but with art hour, naps, swimming pools, and ping pong playoffs. No real punishment whatsoever – no making license plates for the Saudi royal family’s fleet of luxury cars or crafting shiny trinkets to bade King Abdullah’s forgiveness. Nothing but being locked into a community recreational facility where everyone has one thing in common: militant Islamic backgrounds. How warm and fuzzy an approach for an otherwise ruthless kingdom! Geez and to think people were bitching about how easily Martha Stewart got off when she was sentenced to a low security prison when convicted of obstruction of justice relating to her shady stock deals!

I can’t see this for anything else but what it is. Saudi Arabia completely backs the extremist viewpoints taken by these men they’ve ‘sentenced’ to their prisonesque Club Med because what else makes sense? Oh along with the country club atmosphere, rehabbed jihadists leave Camp Jihad with some pretty posh departing gifts. If you successfully complete ‘jihadist rehab’ and promise with your hand on the Koran that you’d never ever ever think of setting off a car bomb on a crowded street near the central market for maximum human casualties not even in a gazillion years(wink wink with fingers crossed behind your back), you leave with the pretty pictures you painted to hang on the fridge at home, a few cavities from drinking too much Pepsi and forgetting to brush, and probably a wad of cash to pay for your wedding and a new car or house. What a way to reward a terrorist – oh, I meant rehabilitate a terrorist. For fak’s sake, is this how we can get some rest and a free car? Declare allegiance to a terrorist organization and be sentenced to ‘rehabilitation’? Please lock me away and make me take a nap and have a new Audi waiting for me upon release, ok? I’m not picky. Any Audi will do.

Are we to believe this? Are we to fakin believe Saudi Arabia seriously hopes to ‘cure’ the extremist mentality or are we to see it as Saudi Arabia giving the US the finger yet again with this blatant malfeasance of ‘justice’ for those who admitted openly they were out to kill in the name of al Qaeda that’s kind of known to have a big thing against America and westerners in general. I guess I find it so faking twisted knowing you can be stoned to death for being raped BUT admit you participated in some terrorist bombings and come home to the equivalent of a hero’s welcome and more prizes than you can even win on Wheel of Fortune!

Your vote:

No votes yet